Monday, January 7, 2013
Saturday marked 14 years since I started this all-defining chapter of my life called Motherhood. I was such a baby myself, and had no idea the amount of love that was about to consume my life. I remember that day so vividly, and everything went so smoothly and quickly, and before I knew it she was here...screaming her fool head off (after having Brooklyn diagnosed with acid reflux, I am fairly certain Sydney had the exact same thing). It is a fine balance to figure out how to instill and encourage in your kids the things you hope and want for them that differ from your own past, without being pushy or overbearing. I feel incredibly blessed that Syd is so goal-oriented and disciplined (she has been soooooo good about wearing her back brace every single night for the last 14 months). She has always been such a rule follower. She is a sweet and quiet gal. Although she still doesn't know what she would want to major in in college, she has always wanted to go on a mission and go to BYU. She is a much cooler and hip and less awkward 14 year old than I ever was at her age, and for that I am grateful. I will state the obvious and declare how nervous and totally apprehensive I am to think about my girl starting high school next year. It's nerve-wracking to me. So many awkward, brutal, and hurtful things can happen in high school. Rejection, dramatic friends, boyfriends, etc - all that glorious and painful stuff lies ahead. This could potentially be a pretty big year for her. I am admittedly nervous and mentally preparing myself for what may lie ahead with her back. It's a little weird - she is the exact same age I was when I had to have my own back surgery. The curve of her back spans the exact same vertebrae that mine did before my surgery: T11 - L4. Am I scared? Yeah. As of her last appointment, her curve was progressing despite wearing her brace. She goes back next month, and we see if it has increased any more.
I absolutely love this girl more than I ever thought my heart could handle. She makes me want to throttle her some days, but the days she makes me beam with pride far outnumber the bad days. So, umm, yeah.... I just want the next 4 years to move in slow motion.
Posted by Erin at 11:09 PM